In 2006 I moved into a studio that was 'open plan'. This one was very open... It was basically a completely open warehouse, that is - I got one wall and my space was separated from other spaces simply by virtue of whatever furniture we happened to have... you know - desks, milk crates, piles of books, armchairs.
It was a great space, very cheap and had quite lovely light. As it was above a Buddhist centre I could imagine a whole lot of really great energy floating up to me from below. However the lack of walls and privacy was affecting my ability to work. I have always been quite sensitive and private about my work, especially when it is unfinished. So I was really struggling in this space.
It didn't help that the man in the space next to me was always there and hummed and sighed a lot when he worked. I spent as much of my energy while there struggling with myself over anxiety and inhibition as I did on thinking about the work... not a great way to be.
I was describing my dilemma to a friend and she asked a very pertinent question which I answered in what I thought was a flippant manner...
she asked: 'Did anything ever happen to you to make you so inhibited about working in front of other people?'
I said: 'Well there was that time when I was colouring in an elephant in a colouring book and got teased...'
she made me explain...
'Well, I guess I was about seven. We had gotten some free colouring books from some fast food place and were back home colouring in. I was going great guns on an elephant picture! I was shading and staying in the lines and taking so much care to get it right. I had soft gradations of tone and colour, a soft flush of pink in the ears... I finished it and was sooooo proud.
I can't remember who it was, maybe one of my brothers, maybe one of the neighbours, but one of them laughed at me and said in the mocking, know-all way that kids use to devastate each other, 'Elephants don't have pink ears!'
I think I contested that and we got into a fight and so Mum came to adjudicate. She said, 'I don't think elephants do have pink ears, maybe you were thinking of rabbits.' (I might point out that real rabbits do not have pink ears any more than real elephants do). At which point i burst into tears and was inconsolable. Mum tried to make it better by saying nice things like, 'You can colour them in any way you want, it is a drawing and you can make them purple if you want to.' It was no use, I hadn't been trying to be creative - I had stayed in the lines and shaded beautifully in the name of perfection - not imagination!!!!'
My friend heard this story and said simply, 'I think you should paint elephants for a while - especially in this open plan studio space - and paint its damned ears pink, paint the whole thing pink!'
And so I did.
And from there I fell in love with them. I fell in love with painting them, I fell in love with what they started to represent and how pertinent the symbolism of them seemed to be for me. (There will be more on that later)
So now within my art practice I have been painting and thinking almost exclusively about elephants for over a year now. In that time I have been having stalls at the artist's markets and have found an abundance of fellow elephant enthusiasts out there.
It was a great space, very cheap and had quite lovely light. As it was above a Buddhist centre I could imagine a whole lot of really great energy floating up to me from below. However the lack of walls and privacy was affecting my ability to work. I have always been quite sensitive and private about my work, especially when it is unfinished. So I was really struggling in this space.
It didn't help that the man in the space next to me was always there and hummed and sighed a lot when he worked. I spent as much of my energy while there struggling with myself over anxiety and inhibition as I did on thinking about the work... not a great way to be.
I was describing my dilemma to a friend and she asked a very pertinent question which I answered in what I thought was a flippant manner...
she asked: 'Did anything ever happen to you to make you so inhibited about working in front of other people?'
I said: 'Well there was that time when I was colouring in an elephant in a colouring book and got teased...'
she made me explain...
'Well, I guess I was about seven. We had gotten some free colouring books from some fast food place and were back home colouring in. I was going great guns on an elephant picture! I was shading and staying in the lines and taking so much care to get it right. I had soft gradations of tone and colour, a soft flush of pink in the ears... I finished it and was sooooo proud.
I can't remember who it was, maybe one of my brothers, maybe one of the neighbours, but one of them laughed at me and said in the mocking, know-all way that kids use to devastate each other, 'Elephants don't have pink ears!'
I think I contested that and we got into a fight and so Mum came to adjudicate. She said, 'I don't think elephants do have pink ears, maybe you were thinking of rabbits.' (I might point out that real rabbits do not have pink ears any more than real elephants do). At which point i burst into tears and was inconsolable. Mum tried to make it better by saying nice things like, 'You can colour them in any way you want, it is a drawing and you can make them purple if you want to.' It was no use, I hadn't been trying to be creative - I had stayed in the lines and shaded beautifully in the name of perfection - not imagination!!!!'
My friend heard this story and said simply, 'I think you should paint elephants for a while - especially in this open plan studio space - and paint its damned ears pink, paint the whole thing pink!'
And so I did.
And from there I fell in love with them. I fell in love with painting them, I fell in love with what they started to represent and how pertinent the symbolism of them seemed to be for me. (There will be more on that later)
So now within my art practice I have been painting and thinking almost exclusively about elephants for over a year now. In that time I have been having stalls at the artist's markets and have found an abundance of fellow elephant enthusiasts out there.
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